Let’s start with the word “FAKE”, this means pretending to feel something that you do not really feel, or not meaning what you say. Yes, a lot of people do that and for me, l call this, speaking from the two sides of the mouth.
So, talking about “Fake Sympathy, this is when people act like they care about you and understand what you’re going through when in reality, they don’t really give a damn about you rather, they are mocking you and you see them come close to you pretending that they love you. when you are in pain.
Often times, we hear people say “Trust me l know how you feel” and I always wonder how someone can know how l feel when that someone is not the one wearing the painful shoe that l am wearing. This goes to say that our thresholds for pain are quite different and so also the way we react to things. Don’t get me wrong, l am not saying that everyone who says that, is a fake, all “am saying is that we should be careful and not allow our vulnerability to take the better part of us at the point of us divulging sensitive information that may be used against us in the long run. “Open your eyes and Be wise”.
When someone is bereaved or encounters some sort of unpleasant or difficult situation, friends and well-wishers call or visit to sympatise with the person and this act is usually appreciated. It does not mean that because sympatisers flock around you that the situation will change. No, but that show of concern and love helps you to feel a little better knowing that someone or people have your back and it gives you some kind of hope and strength to live on. It assures you that you are not alone. But how can we tell a genuine sympathy from a fake sympathy?
We hear stories of how friends betray their friends or even one’s partner in a relationship. And when l mean betrayed, l am talking about someone you trusted the most taking advantage of your misfortune (s) of life to deal with you while, you are there giving the person the accolade of an Angel not knowing that it is all but a scam. Trust me, it is the most heartbreaking feeling in the world. Just when you are in pain and you think that you have someone who loves and cares for you, someone who shares your pain during your hard times but no, it is fake sympathy being shown to you while the person is actually enjoying your pain and laughing at you behind your back.
Be careful when everything is going well for you in your career or profession and some people come and present themselves as your biggest fan. They can be praising you at that moment and at the same time waiting for your downfall so that they can enjoy it. Always take time to study the people you move with either as friends or colleagues, there is usually some signs that give them up if you pay proper attention or listen to your instincts. If you are someone that pays attention to events around you, you will definitely know when you are in the wrong company.
Mind how you share your success stories or your stories of misfortune, if you must tell, watch the countenance of the people when telling your stories and you will certainly observe when it changes either for good or bad. There are people who can hardly hide their feeling when they are angry or happy with you. For those who are not happy when you share any good news about yourself, the smile on their face drops automatically as they listen to you and so also when you tell your story of woe, their face unconsciously beams with smiles. You will immediately notice that they are glad that you are having problems. These category of people, l call “Bad – Belle people “
Watch closely those who are sometimes too friendly towards you, they can be super nice when you meet them at first. They will tell you sweet stories that you want to hear, they will offer to do heaven and earth for you. Believe me, we have plenty of them in our midst and often times it is hard for us to distinguish the real people from the fake. My advice will be that, you be yourself and just pay attention to all the things they do and ask the Holy Spirit to guide and help you find out the truth about them.
There are other set of people who help others and flash it on social media for the world to see. Or they go about blabbing it to whoever cares to listen. What would you call that? Of course, it is fake sympathy because when you ask them to do something that will not be recognized in public, they come up with all sorts of excuses. Believe me, these set of people are fake sympathizers. People like that find it difficult to have eye contact with you when you are requesting for help from them. They start by looking up and down or they will change the subject matter. It all means that they don’t really care about you or the pain you are going through. They just play fake hero in public to get accolade from the people.
Be wise and be careful with the people you call your friends; they may turn out to be your worst enemies. Or people you approach for help. Look before you leap and more importantly don’t put your trust in any human being rather, put all your trust in God who will never fail you no matter what. “A word is enough for the wise” Be blessed.
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