The great philosopher Socrates once wrote, “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you will become very happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” That being said, marriage is not just a ceremony or a legal arrangement; it is a covenant of commitment. It is a decision to love, stay loyal, and grow with your spouse through all seasons of life. But today’s world has turned marriage into a laughing stock, where marriages are often short-lived due to unmet expectations, lack of patience, or external pressures. In all of these however, the power of commitment remains the bedrock of a lasting union.
Marriage is a beautiful thing but, sometimes love alone is not enough to keep it together. When we say ‘I do’, l believe that it should be forever and we must give our heart, time and energy to building a home. no matter what happens along the way. Be it known therefore, that what holds marriage for a life time is commitment and love, even though love have a way of surprising us. With time we tend to notice certain changes in our spouse and we start to ask, what went wrong. The truth is that relationships require efforts from both sides, and when that balance is lost, it becomes difficult to hold on fought in the marriage. And if we are not careful and patient, we make the easiest decision, which is walking away and the next statement that follows is, ‘’ it was necessary for my peace and well- being’’ . So, what about the sacrifice and service to each other as we are told during the marriage class, all gone?. The question l always ask when l here such statement is, are you sure that you have sincerely played your part faithfully, emotionally and physically well, have you prioritized the relationship over your personal convenience ? See, nobody is saying that marriage is a bed of roses, with no tough times, No. but all we are saying is that, for marriage to persevere , last and be sweet, there must be some kind of commitment. Marriage will face tough seasons—financial struggles, sickness, disagreements, and changes in life stages but it is commitment that carries the couples through the storms, when feelings fluctuate. Commitment gives both partners the assurance that they can grow, make mistakes, and heal without fear of abandonment. This creates a safe emotional environment for both spouses and child. All it requires, is for the partners or partner (where there is an identified offender), to be willing to change, to become better persons or person and fight for the family. When this happens and there is some noticeable transformation, the hurting hearts will relax and return, and the marriage will be stronger. The partners will be wiser and more committed to making their marriage work. So, the sooner we or rather the new generation couples begin to understand that marriage is not a life sentence but a joyful privilege, the better for the institution of marriage.
Genesis 2: 24, says ‘’Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh’’ this deep intimacy described in this passage is founded on the commitment implied in the earlier phrases. For starters, when you get married, your commitment implies that you must leave some things behind. The full meaning of this passage is easier to appreciate if you bear in mind that the Bible promotes a high level of respect for parents. Trust me, commitment is the root of what it takes to build and maintain a truly lasting, happy life together, obedience also. Honestly, the couple must cloth themselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other’s inadequacies, and forgive whatever grievances they may have against one another, forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all, these virtues strengthen the love, which binds the couple together in perfect unity. Commitment allows couples to go beyond surface-level affection and build authentic connection even when true intimacy – emotional, spiritual, and physical—takes time to develop.
Experience has shown that couples with a common belief system and life goals tend to stay stronger because knowing where they are going as a couple creates unity and direction. However, if the opposite is the case, the couple should respect each other’s opinions, differences, and dignity especially during conflicts, as this builds trust and deepens their commitment. Remember that in marriage, there must be sacrifice and service. We may sometimes need to put the other person first and support him/ her, even when it costs us something. Love really demands us to be patient and forgiving. In marriage also, we need to communicate frequently, honestly and kindly, for such conversations keep the emotional doors open. Listening with empathy is also as important as expressing your needs. Despite your busy schedules, pray together regularly and reaffirm your vows periodically to remind each other of your promises and invest time in shared activities and meals. Celebrate milestones such as, anniversaries, birthdays, and answered prayers. Always speak positively about your spouse to others because honour, builds unity. Don’t forget the three Cs, you will be far richer when you remember the three “Cs” of a great marriage these are; Communication. Commitment and Christ.
In conclusion, a lasting marriage is built not on feelings alone but on the daily decision to stay in the marriage, to grow the marriage and to love each other. To be honest, commitment doesn’t eliminate hardship but it empowers you to endure, to heal, to thrive as one and understand that divorce is not an option, except however, in the case of emotional agony and threat to life. Be that as it may, commitment motivates us to keep pressing forward and resolve problems and conflicts as they arise.